Adversity is a bully. I’ve had many, many bouts dealing with one particular form of it; prejudgment. As you’re aware, this can negatively shape how people treat you, respect you, and can limit your opportunities. The effects once put me in a bucket jumping in effort to avoid being missed, looked past, avoided, dodged, side-stepped, juked, hurdled, and any other action word that defines evasion.
Eventually I had a turning point. I realized that I couldn’t just pass the blame on everyone else…I had to take some ownership. Like a company going out of business from failing to appeal to their customer’s, I was failing at being adaptable. This realization brought me to the discovery of personal branding. I learned quickly that presenting myself in a more universal way saved me much of the hassle involved in overcoming the obstacles that ignorance put in my way.
Perception Control
Developing your personal brand offers the ability to help shape and control the perceptions that others form of you. It’s not a game of deception; it’s taking a conscious approach in your personal presentation to gain the most favorable perception possible. Let’s face it folks, we quickly come to judgment of others to determine their credibility, authenticity, and overall character. Sadly, our perceptions are often based on misunderstandings; unfairly derived from an image, which we’ve been conditioned to accept as truth.
Unfortunately these judgments happen swiftly, often before we get a chance to know a person. And this is one aspect where your personal brand comes in to save the day. If you choose to take action, you can minimize the bad and illuminate the good by utilizing the power you have in controlling the way you’re perceived.
Generally speaking, people instinctively judge other people. We do this [mostly] for awareness purposes. Here stands the issue: we judge people by the way they look and carry themselves, which is hardly ever correct and a terrible methodology. Our judgment is shaped by harmful experiences, movies, television, news stories and social stigmas. WE ARE CONDITIONED!
You can very easily get through life, personal and professional without paying one bit of attention to your personal brand. I think we naturally make adjustments along the course anyway, figuring out what does and doesn’t work as we proceed. But there are two sides of the spectrum, with a large delta in between. Deliberate effort builds a strong personal brand.
You’re empowered with choice, so use it to your advantage. Developing a personal brand isn’t about being liked, being dishonest or promoting a false image. It’s about displaying your best qualities and minimizing inaccurate perceptions.
Why is this important? Because the way you’re perceived – is the way you will be treated (in most cases). Now it’s making sense, huh?
Concluding with Positivity
If you’ve managed to start off on the wrong page in the past…it’s okay because an unfavorable perception can be changed. Your personal brand isn’t meant to deceive, it’s meant to accurately portray. Imagine for a moment: if there’s a hot market for white cars and you happened to have a white car for sale…you would keep it clean to make sure its white sparkle stands out as much as it can. You want to present the car in its best condition. [STOP] That was a terrible example…wow! Used car sales and positive personal branding is so oxymoronic…but hopefully you caught the drift.
I’m not oblivious; I know I’ll still face the adverse symptoms of prejudgment. But as you see, I have a much more effective ways of dealing with it than in the past. I’ve learned through experience that I have more control than I thought. You too have the same control over your own personal brand.
It shouldn’t matter how we present ourselves, how we dress, or how we communicate…but the fact is – it does matter. It matters to you, it matters to me, and it matters to them. SO PUT YOUR BEST SELF FORWARD and control the perception!
DISCUSSION: Please share any stories that you have on overcoming adversity, particularly the kind spoken about here. Have you ever hit a point when you realized that you had to change the way you presented yourself? Do you have any tips to offer? What you share just may help someone else!
{ 74 comments… read them below or add one }
Jk,
Growing up the perception of me was that I was too serious, too angry, and just kind of a little punk. Hey, it was somewhat true. I never smiled, never joked, but in my defense I was always around adults so I had to grow up fast.
Anyway, as I took on sales jobs and started one of my first businesses over a decade ago those perceptions were stifling my progress. Customers were intimidated by me. My forced humor (to turn what seemed like a natural scowl upside-down) wasn’t getting through. People weren’t buying my (our: partnership) services. It was like my negativity was seeping through and transferring to them. I was giving bad vibes.
It took years to fix this. It was mainly mindset changes. But the point is, I laugh freely. I smile often. People know me for being a joker and having a great time. So even though I’m somewhat of a workaholic, now the perception of me is “approachable” and people “buy me.”
You nailed it here with personal branding. Perception of that brand, even if it’s just perception voiced by tweets and FB updates, are spread. If you monitor this you can see how others see you instead of how you think your brand appears.
Hope this made sense…I just kinda hit the keys with reckless abandon. Thanks Jk!
Jon recently posted..25 Ways to Turn YOU Into a Business Free PDF
Hey Jon, I greatly appreciate you sharing some of your personal story, helping driving the importance of managing perception. It’s need is a part of our reality, no matter how we slice it, so taking the control into our hands is well worthwhile.
As you pointed out, it’s not a overnight development process. Creating a personal brand takes time, and requires more than the physical (or tangible) – it starts in the mind.
Thank you so much man. I appreciate the discussion. You bring a lot to the table.
PEACE
Hey Jk,
It is very true hay people usually judge you without getting to know the real you. They see and image or hear something you say then they have their mind made up on who you are. It’s a sad story but, every does that or has done that in their life at some point. It’s called judging a book by it’s cover.
I totally get where your going with this but, by changing the way you dress, act, and talk in front of certain people, then changing it back to normal behind the scenes is putting up a front to me. Why do you want so hard to please people that you have to change who you really are to fit their standards and get their approval? Why can’t yup just be yourself and be happy with that?
Personally, I don’t want to live my life putting up a front just to make more money or fit in another persons guidelines. That’s just me though and I know I probely stand alone, but that’s perfectly okay with me.
Just my 2 cents.
God bless,
William Veasley
William Tha Great recently posted..To Have It All You Must Let Go of a Lot
Hey William,
When it comes to personal branding..it’s about appropriateness and “time and place”. Trust me, it’s NOT about putting up a front my man. Really think about that for a second ::: should I dress how I dress to workout as I do when I meet with clients, trying to get ink a 7 figure deals. Or even less drastic…should I dress how I do in my “normal” clothes; jeans t-shirt and Nikes, as I would in a business setting?
Not to ask a stupid question, but do you think that appropriateness plays a part in those equations?
And, appearance is just one part. It’s what we talk about, how we communicate, how we hold ourselves. I can’t speak to an elderly lady at church the same way I speak to one of my brothers. Are you with you on that one? Businesses target their marketing campaigns differently to differently target markets…see what I’m saying? Do you think they are selling out by having flexible ways of presenting?
In this area William, in time I think you’ll see what I’m talking about. I know I know, you will never change, and you already know (you’ve told me)…but I have a feeling that a guy like you will do big things…big things require us to absorb new things – even things that we think that we’ll never change. I stand firm too: I will never wear skinny jeans – no way, not me!
The reason I find our conversation particularly interesting and worthwhile is because I had a similar one with my little brother (21)…his mind is closed to many of the advices that the world has taught and continually teaches…Although he’s in jail currently – he’ll one day come to learn. We all come to learn one day, easy or hard.
As always, I love the difference in opinion. I respect it and I think it helps everyone grow. Gaining different perspectives is what helps better angle our own.
PEACE to you young player!
Hey Jk,
Thanks for the awesome comment!
I swear you give off the impression of and older brother. Many of the things you say would be something I would hear coming from my older brother. He is in the military so I don’t talk to him much.
You always make excellent points and your questions are never stupid, because whether you believe me or not they really make me think deeply. You are absolutely right about what I would wear to the gym vs something I would wear anywhere else.
As far as having meetings with my future clients goes… Believe me when I say my I could be that guy in the nice krispy suit. I could get a nice taper fade, chin clean up, and look like the model young business man.
The thing is thats not me. I hate wearing suits or dressing up for that matter. I rather not try to live my life putting up a perfectly good act rather then find a way to be completely myself(wear something like dickies, small tee, and some vans). There is always a way for you to be what you want and who you want if you work hard enough.
Yeah, It may take me longer to build up clients. But, Hey you can trust this young homie that I’m always going to speak how I feel and dress how I want. When I meet people your only either going to see me in jeans, dickies, or cargo shorts. 24/7.
When I started this journey I know I was going to meet people like you, because to tell you the truth you said just like many people around me Jk. I feel like, if your comfortable with being that guy in the suit, then that’s perfectly okay with me.
If your not, why not just find a way to be who you want to be?
Thanks again!
God bless,
William Veasley
William Tha Great recently posted..You Got What You Ordered!
You know what William – I don’t like wearing suites either man. Trust me. The way I dress for business and for pleasure are night and day. Literally, night and day.
I’m glad you replied. Because I think you made a statement that was worth sharing here, that I hope others read as well. you said: “Yeah, It may take me longer to build up clients. But, Hey you can trust this young homie that I’m always going to speak how I feel and dress how I want.”
You get it man. You realize that everything comes with a price. You’re willing to pay a certain price for a certain action. I respect that 100%.
For myself – my grind is different. I have 3 kids. I have brothers, sister and cousins who look up to me. For that reason, I HAVE TO sacrifice my comforts (dressing a certain way, talking a certain way)…because I can’t afford let opportunities pass me by, because I wasn’t able willing to be adaptable.
Keep that focus man (as I always say)…it’ll take you places!
Thanks for the reply
Hey Jk,
Thanks for the last reply! I’m glad I replied also, everytime I learn a little more about you my man!
I think most people don’t like wearing suits. There are a few that do like james bond lol, but it’s not about that. For you it’s more about presenting the right image for your family and kids. You are right that we have totally different grinds, but in a way thery are not so different.
You just want to present the best image possible for your kids so that they will grow up making the most strategic moves to be able to better their future. I think I understand your grind a little more Jk.
The route I’m choosing to take will most surely come with a cost. The cost of not looking as professional as the next person. I have thought long and hard about what I’m doing, and I tell myself if I’m going to follow my dreams why not go after what I really want. I guess that’s just a life where I’m almost in complete control under God.
I know its going to be a tough road as it already is going on 3 and a half months without seeing anyone outside my immediate family and co-workers. I thought that by keeping myslef away from distractions that over time it would become eaiser to stay focus. Now, it seems like the distractions are finding me and its becoming harder to stay focused.
At the end of everyday I’m left with the knowledge that hardwork will take me where I want to be. So, with that said I’m going to really try and boost things around here another level. I want to keep pushing myself to work harder, harder, and HARDER!
Thanks again!
God Bless,
William Veasley
P.s- this is my last comment ( ; Don’t want to take up all your comment space!
William Tha Great recently posted..My Trusty Pen and Paper!
Will – you never take up too much comment space. Keep it coming as often as you like. I enjoy the convo, and always learn in process. Plus, this is exactly what community is about.
I think we’re both on the same page now on this subject. It’ll come up again, so let’s see where the next conversation takes us. Until then – we both appreciate each others hustle and view on personal brand.
PEACE
JK – Awesome post brother!
I can definitely relate to this BIG TIME!
First of all, I like that you made it a point to emphasize that through out life we are “CONDITIONED” by experiences that shape our thoughts and beliefs. What we see on TV, what we hear people say and what we experience leads our subconscious minds to rationalize something that may be perceived but not necessarily real.
I’ll give you one good example – ME! I grew in a family with limited financial resources (just an eloquent way of saying that I grew up poor). In the neighborhood that I grew up in was pretty crime riden. Growing up in that type of environment you have 1 of 2 options, join the crowds or do something different that will get you the heck out of there. Obviously, I chose the latter.
Even then, however, I knew that I didn’t want to bring any unnecessary attention to myself that would make me stand out in front of a crowd. I always took care of school work and I was in higher achieving classes but if you looked at me at the time, you wouldn’t think I belonged there. I had a taper-fade and I wasn’t clean shaven like I am today (of course you have to remember this was in High School).
When the time came to get out of my neighborhood (finally) and go to college, I took some of those same appearance habits. I noticed that people were less willing to come up to me and spark a conversation. So I decided to test something out. I grew out my hair (got a hair style), kept clean shaven and started dressing a lot nicer – and it worked!
The impact was almost instantaneous, I could definitely tell people were more willing to talk to me and hold conversations not just small talk.
In the end I learned that it’s not about being someone you’re not. It’s about learning when to change. Change is not a bad thing. In fact, it’s a great thing. You can change certain aspects about who you are without being fake or being someone you’re not. Change is necessary. When it comes to your personal brand and appearance, change is something that should be embraced not frowned upon.
Hector Avellaneda recently posted..Everyone has 99 of what is required to succeed as an Entrepreneur Whats missing
Thanks for sharing that story Hector. That was a great representation of what I’m talking about. You realized that certain things work in certain areas in life, and not in others. To be hard headed to the truth behind the reality is being ignorant and self-limiting, if you ask me. I’ve been there…oh yeah, guilty as charged.
You know Hector, my situation is similar but different than yours. I know how to speak to people; from the streets to the boardroom. If you’d see me in either, you’d never imagine that I could adapt to the other side. And dress…during work – I dress up. But besides that…I dress however I want..typically in jeans, t-shirt and Nikes…sometimes I get crazy and throw on a Polo. But however I dress, it typically fits the environment.
Thanks a ton for the game you share around here.
PEACE!
My pleasure JK!
Hector Avellaneda recently posted..Everyone has 99 of what is required to succeed as an Entrepreneur Whats missing
Jk, this was a powerful post man! I totally agree with the value of personal branding; the very essence of branding is to create an image or a feeling in other people’s minds that you’d want them to associate with good feelings. Coca-Cola have their brand which people associate with, as do KitKat, Apple, and a whole host of other successful companies.
The same principle applies to individuals; I could drift through life, taking direction from preconceptions and other people’s orders, or I could ‘wake up’, realise that I needed to make a name for myself in this world, and focus on forging my own brand.
And what would my brand be like? Would I make my personal brand to represent passion and courage? How about generosity and grace? Power? Discipline? Adventure? Creating your personal brand can take months, even years, but it’s worth it in the end. Once it’s completely set, you have your true identity, your own brand which others will recognise, appreciate, and respect for what it means to you. They’ll see that this personal brand is you, the true you, no-one else. No labelling, no bias, no stereotyping.
Your own personal brand is all you, because you know you’re going to shine in this world
Stuart – your offering here was POWERFUL. Personally, I think that labeling, bias and stereotyping will always exists. If it’s not age, it’s sexual preference…if it’s not race then it’s religion. Somethings we just can’t and won’t change (like our age)…they are set. But it’s the presentation of those things that can help us control the perceptions that we create in this world where most prejudge…not from hate, but from conditioning from life experiences.
Your great Stu – thank you for sharing your wisdom!
Hi Jk,
This is a fabulous post. I wrote a lengthy article a few months back about “branding.” I dislike that word as I believe it has too much of a commercial connotation. I believe in the principles behind it though, just not the term: branding. To me branding myself makes me feel like a commodity.
Putting that aside, I did have to do some image control when I started my blog.
Many people are under the misconception that using “intuition” is a something that only fortune tellers do. I had to write and present information that would convince my readers otherwise.
Developing your Intuition is about using all of the sensory input available to you to make better more informed choices and decisions. Making better decisions means that you’ll have a better outcome and live a better more successful life.
I guess you could say my “brand” is about teaching my audience to how to use Intuition as a Success Strategy.
Angela Artemis/Powered by Intuition recently posted..The Miracle That is Sahaja Yoga Meditation
Angela – Love it…using intuition as a success strategy.
I never thought about the implications of a word like brand, in relations to using it in a non “business” way. And, I’m siding with you on that all the way. It does have a non-personal component, even with the word “personal” attached to it. Eye opening. I’m going to really think hard about a new buz word to replace “brand”.
Thank you so so much Angela!
Hey Jk, as you said How we dress, How we communicate, has a massive impact on the way people perceive us. my parents always told me dress your best look good smell good and kept good hygiene – They would say, If people don’t think you respect yourself they are going to have a hard time respecting you.
I found this especially true When I was working in sales, The way in which I dressed and my language had a positive side effect on my Bank balance. This strategy also helped me to get two beautiful kids and give me years of fun in the build up
Lloyd,
And your parents weren’t lying were they? They knew exactly what they were talking about…and I’m sure it came from lessons learned in life. They wanted to make sure that you positioned yourself to maximize whatever it is that you’re after in life. And you better believe that my kids, will also get those same lessons.
I appreciate how you always come through, and always add more to the discussion. Thank you Lloyd!
Jk,
Typically, I think of branding in the professional sense, but to bring this concept into our personal lives makes a lot of sense, too.
It’s important to let people know (even our spouse, children, close friends, etc) who we are what we stand for in life. My brand is to be a kind, positive influence for others. I make certain that my words and actions are aligned with this strategy.
Thank you for an incredibly useful and thought-provoking post today.
Alex
Hi Alex – I too initially thought of personal branding in a manner that was professional only. But the elements of it really have their place in all walks of life…as you’ve shared (making certain that your actions/words are aligned with what you stand for).
Thank you kindly Alex.
JK,
Excellent, thought provoking post with great take-away value. There are certainly some things we have no control over: racism, sexism, ageism. But by being our best, and being cognizant of how our actions and even our appearance can be perceived, we can take the time and effort to brand ourselves accordingly and intelligently. Thanks for shedding some light.
Jennifer Brown Banks recently posted..Are You Selling Yourself Short
Hi Jennifer – Ain’t that right…“…by being best, and being cognizant of how our actions and even our appearance can be perceived, we can take the time and effort to brand ourselves accordingly and intelligently.”
I can’t even add anything to that. I wouldn’t water it down with my words! So, thank you kindly!
Jk,
This post really resonates with me man, and I’ll tell you why in a minute. But first, I wanted to focus on a critical statement you made;
“Your personal brand isn’t meant to deceive, it’s meant to accurately portray.”
Personal branding is everywhere. It permeates our entire society. It begins in school as we begin to dress and act in ways that we think define who we are. I’m not putting a negative spin on branding, but it’s a fact. Our brand defines us in school….the jock, the geek, the class clown, etc. The same principles apply in the business world….right? My point is, this stuff starts early and is not confined to business or the web.
Back to your point, branding that accurately portrays who we are. Covey talks about the two ethics that define us: the character ethic and the personality ethic. The character ethic is an inside-out approach to personal development. It starts with integrity. The personality ethic is the opposite, an outside-in approach where we model ourselves based on other people’s opinions.
To the extent that our personal brand emanates from true character and integrity, it will serve us well. On the other hand, if our brand doesn’t represent who we truly are, if it is an empty shell, it will eventually collapse just like any other false structure. That’s why I love your statement, because we have to keep it real!
Now, regarding my personal branding. I was the perfect example of the anti-brand. My first blog, http://www.figliving.com, is a textbook case of a blogger trying to be influential with absolutely zero branding. I blogged pretty hard for over a year, and pumped out some pretty decent stuff from time to time, but it never got off the ground. Why? There was no person attached to it. There was no feeling attached to it. It was just some helpful info, but nothing to keep ‘em coming back.
Now with Skyward, I have taken a 180 degree turn. I have tried to build a brand, and the results have been tremendous. Within the first three weeks, I had received more traffic and comments than the first 6 months on fig. Only mentioning this to make your point Jk…..branding is pivotal, and an absolute must to building a tribe.
This was an amazing post Jk….you’re a beacon of truth!
Now, to
Jason from Skyward recently posted..“I am a Servant”- 4 Words of Pure Power!
Jason – you laid it down my friend. I took notes like a student…see I’ve capture below what really touched me in your comment:
-for sharing your view of the importance behind personal branding. “It permeates our entire society”
-for introducing Covey’s teaching on the two ethics that define us. “The personality ethic is the opposite, an outside-in approach where we model ourselves based on other people’s opinions.”
-and for sharing your transition from FrigLiving.com to Skywardblog.net. I just spent a moment at both, comparing and contrasting and I get it. I can see the difference. I really liked Frig – but I find more of an emotional attachment to Skyward.
Thank you for taking the time in pouring your heart into this “blog post worthy” comment. I really appreciate it man! PEACE
Whenever I think of branding I think of a logo?
A logo is a graphic visual representation of a company. It is used to create a public image or perception without the use of direct conversation. It’s purpose is to communicate trust, reliability, security, and prestige depending on the companies product. A logo is normally the first thing your eyes are drawn to on the shelf or second if you are like me. I look at the price first. Many people base their entire shopping experience upon the name on the label of most products.
As a person we do not have the ability to walk around with a sign over our head that indicates our strength, reliablity and trustworthiness. No matter how hard Arby’s tries to make us think this is possible. “I’m thinking Arby’s.”
Your physical appearance and body language represents your personal logo. This is a graphic visual representation of who and what you are. Your personal logo is how you are perceived without you ever saying a word. There were many possible opportunities that have come and gone without you even being aware of it and why?
Someone didn’t like your logo.
Controling your perception is extremely valuable. The goal is not be fake but to open up yourself to additional opportunites. Great Post Jk.
Frank recently posted..I Can’t Stop Now
Frank! You totally brought it in this comment. It’s clear that you have a certain emotion, understanding and experience regarding personal branding. The way you chopped it up and molded it into something tangible, “a logo”…it really makes it all the more tangible to understand.
There isn’t one part of your comment that I would agree with. And how in the world could I add to it…you covered it all.
I do recall your article, months and months back where you spoke about a personal brand being like a logo. Thanks for resurfacing this point here.
Value is the name of your game. Thank you kindly!
Hey JK
Your bottom line here sums up this post perfectly “SO PUT YOUR BEST SELF FORWARD and control the perception!” When blogging we’re on a hiding to nowhere if we’re misunderstood before we get started so you are raising a hugely important point that it’s all too easy for us to overlook. It’s great to be so natural and so confident that we don’t care what people think about us in ‘real life’… by which I mean, during personal interactions on a daily basis. When we physically interact with others there are so many factors at play such as eye contact, body language, how we carry ourselves etc that we manage to transmit our ‘brand’ in ways that are impossible to pin down. However, as bloggers or entrepreneurs who are dependent on online communication to get people to believe in us and our sincerity, plus our ability or authority to sell our wares or our wisdom, then ‘branding’ is of the utmost importance and relevance. You’re right JK…it’s not about making a good impression or a bad impression. It’s all about making an accurate impression of who we are. Thanks for this valuable reminder JK…your BRAND sure is rocking!
Rosemary recently posted..First it Gave me Wings to Fly…
Rosemary – Your analysis of branding is great. I like what you said in: “we’re on a hiding to nowhere if we’re misunderstood before we get started so you are raising a hugely important point that it’s all too easy for us to overlook.” That, Rosemary, is what this is all about. It’s about maximizing our opportunities.
There’s a very fine line here between authentic and fake – when it comes to personal branding. Many create an image based on what they think will garner the most success. I think these people will always end up less successful in many ways…one being the simple fact that they can’t be truly fulfilled by acting as someone they aren’t. And then there are those who act as who they want to be. I think this is a step better than the latter, but still not “keeping it totally real”. And then there are those like you, who are open, honest, and share themselves with the world – giving their best – and really being of value. That’s where I’m trying to get.
Thank you!
Great article Jk. The one that bothers me the most these days is people are suppose to look like the pictures on magazines. What people don’t see with them is the real person.
I did have an experience when I was younger. People would meet me and think I was a snob. Really I wasn’t, but at that time I had low-self-esteem, so I would try to cover it up by coming across like a snob. I wasn’t being my true self. I do believe that self-esteem and confidence does play a big part on how and what we want people to see.
Now days when I met someone I have to say, “I’m am not sure about this person, but let me get to know the inside.” The outside is only a cover like a book and I go from there.
You are right when it comes the to conditioning, so I mute my advertisements of TV or walk away. LOL
Debbie
Hello there Debbie,
I think you are absolutely right…self-esteem and confidence play a major role in this. Either, we’ve scared that people will reject us for some reason, or we’ve been rejected previously…and have a fear that it’ll happen again. I think this very thing (personal brand), to a level, can help combat that some.
And as you said, the outside (the presentation) is only the cover. Shouldn’t even matter should it…but sadly it does.
Thank you Debbie!
For me JK when I was younger was that I actually accepted the perceptions and began to live them. Rather than see the incoming info as feedback that I’m not on track with who I was I just capitulated and went with it. Until I did the self work to know who I was from values to goals and then supported this ‘real’ self turning perception into 3D reality i.e. ME!. Don’t be apologetic in who you truly are but instead turn what people think about you into what they know and see. Be your own PR machine – Perception Re-alignment!
John Sherry recently posted..Paradox Positivity And How Not To Take Things Personally
Hi John – thank you for sharing some of your story. Your final thought (last 2 sentences) are truly worth an added notation:
“Don’t be apologetic in who you truly are but instead turn what people think about you into what they know and see. Be your own PR machine – Perception Re-alignment!”
And I think that highlights the overarching point of this very subject…turn what people think of you, into the truth of you are…
Thank you John!
Hey JK! Great Post!!
Just recently, I self evaluated my brand, and found that moving forward with my passion of being a professional videography and life coach, there were some changes I felt necessary in order to evoke confidence of others in me. I took out my lip ring (which I’ve had for over 6 years) and let my natural hair colour grow in. I find at first glance, I’m taken a lot more seriously! It is unfortunately that everyone has this built in auto-judge conditioning, but like you said, we can use it to our advantage!
Keep the great posts coming!!
Mike – I took have made some conformations. The day I graduated college – I took out the ear rings. They didn’t define me, I just had them for the heck of it. I was creating a new “point” in my life, so I made some adjustments.
Time and place is everything. And as you shared, to be a professional in videography and in the life coach real, certain changes are needed…at least in the stage where you are making your mark. Once you’ve done so – you tend to be gifted with much more flexibility and acceptance.
Thanks for the comment Mike – I appreciate your continued support.
Hey Jk… Both you and Jennifer said something that I have always lived by, ” Be the best that you can be…” I have come to realize that everyone’s perception is uniquely their own and we as individuals have no control over another person’s perception. We can only hope that as we are being the best that we can be (in the most consistent manner), as we walk through this life a common perception of who we are is formed among our family, friends, peers, and neighbors. The beauty of this common perception not only serves to validate us as an individual, but it also serves to counter against those few naysayers or those who have ill-conceived perception of who we are.
I can think of a time when I met a very bigoted person and I felt this overwhelming need to talk about my academic accomplishments, my travels, my family connections, etc… and then I said to my self, “don’t bother”. At that moment, I had arrived at the realization that no matter what I could have said at that time, it was unlikely that it would have any effect on her perception of me. As I remembered that my deeds speak more than my actual words, I rested in the fact that as my deeds adorn the very essence of who I am, it also contradicts the absurdities of negative perceptions regarding me.
Being the best that we can be is the best way personal “branding” (or adornment.. or hmmm… .. yeah good luck with finding a new buzz word… I thought that I could come up with one)
Cheers!
Ajen recently posted..When Given to Worry… Make Worry-ade- Through the Process of Recreation
Ajen – thank you so much for the great comment. You continue to set a new bar. I’ve been thinking about a new phrase for personal branding and haven’t gotten close to anything worthy…I’m still thinking though!
I think you’re right…everyone’s perception is their own. I believe that 100%. I think that forms the basis on how others perceive us. If we perceived ourselves to be ______, then we will carry ourselves in _______ manner. Hence, most others will perceive us based on our display of being _______.
If we don’t put any thought to it, and just go with the flow (no recognizing appropriateness of time and place), then we allow ourselves to be subjected by WHATEVER stigma the world places on us. And, as you know – that has the tendency to not be of benefit.
Thank you Ajen!
It’s so true, I believe most people would find more fulfillment in their life if they would pay more attention to the way other people may be perceiving them. Though it’s not always easy. I’m a very straightforward person, and sincere to a fault. I’ve been struggling recently to be more wise and tactful
I’m still young, too, haven’t even had my first job yet, but I want to be ready for when I start building my career.
I think the problem for the most part is lack of awareness of the judgements people are making by talking to us. I think it takes some serious contemplation and trying to look at yourself from an outside perspective to really know what you could change. It can be tough, and that’s why people struggle.
At the same time, of course everyone wants to have people like them for the way they are. But I don’t think being conscious of your image and how you come across, and trying to influence that for the positive, isn’t being yourself. You can still be the unique person you are, just in a way that’s perceived more positively by others.
Hi Gemma – welcome to the notebook!
I too believe that our appreciation and fulfillment of life would increase if we took more ownership of the things that affect us. And, you’re right…easier said than done! Your ahead of the game, being that you’ve never even had your first job yet…considering the knowledge that you’ve shared on this subject.
I think when it comes down to it…it’s not about being liked…it’s not about looking a certain way…it’s about gaining the most fair assessment when others prejudge you. It’s about minimizing the negative perceptions.
Welcome again and I hope to see you back in the future Gemma! Thanks for the great comment.
hello jk
how are you?
this is a banger!!!
it is true that we tend to judge people quickly despite having no idea who they are; but rather hold on arguably to the perception which is the first impression lasts longer(it may be true in several cases)
however i like the statement ‘you are empowered with choice’ and the question is to do what??
a) go past the appearance when relating to people
b) identify your best qualities
c) not to get caught up and worn out in the negative experiences of the past.
d) to develop our brand (or improve on it) because it’s meant to highlight who we are.
thanks for sharing this.
take care of yourself and enjoy the rest of the day.
ayo recently posted..What’s On Your Mind
Ayo – Thank you so much to the valuable addition. The answers you provided re: ‘what to do with the power of choice (in relation to our brand) are great.
I’m glad you enjoyed the post. Headed over to see what’s happening at Discovering Purpose. PEACE
Jk Allen recently posted..Control Negative Perception through Personal Branding
Hi JK,
This is a very important subject my friend. Just like Frank, when I hear the word “branding” I think of a logo of a certain company, which really becomes a symbol for this company. When it comes about us humans, we have to put out our best all the time to avoide wrong perceptions from others. As you have mentioned, some people often judge you based on your look, how you talk, how you walk, so always put the best of you out there. Thanks for sharing JK
Dia recently posted..How to be kind to others
Hey Dia – the judgments of others are only natural. I can’t imagine that EVER changing. What can change is us taking ownership of what we have control over. We can’t please all, impress all, and neither of those should be our focus…but we can, as much as we can, project the best, most authentic us as possible…which will lessen the alienation that we could otherwise receive. Not diminish, but lessen!
Thanks Dia! PEACE
If I get that right, you mean doing things you do the best and publicizing you popularity in that subject. Branding and attaching yourself with that, right? Well, you are right if we lived a two dimensional life. One full of assumptions and common factors. But even then, its well worth a whole new thought. Good post. Made my mind clink…
Jaky – Welcome to the Notebook! I appreciate you stopping by and leaving a comment. Seriously, it’s well appreciated.
I’m not really advising to publicize popularity…to me, trying to initialize a human interaction with that proving “how popular you are” can be taken as being boastful and in-genuine. People of great popularity never do this.
My mission with this post is only to promote the importance of your presentation…people assign us to inaccurate buckets all the time, and often based on the way we present ourselves. It’s hard to backtrack these false impressions…having this knowledge, we are empowered to create our personal brand in the light in how we want others to perceive us.
I hope that cleared things up.
Thanks Jaky!
Hi JK,
The idea of showing our best while still being authentic and keeping integrity is crucial. People will make an immediate impression of us, and showing our most genuine self is how we can make the most lasting impression. It’s tough because we can assume that we must portray a flawless and superior image in order to gain support and followers, though this is exactly what people are able to see right through these days. I love your idea of focusing on our most positive qualities and what we do best, and making these stand out as opposed to piecing together some false image. Thanks for sharing!
Joe Wilner recently posted..10 Habits for Life Success
Hello Joe – Thank you for adding your great insight on this topic. Thanks for making mention of the fact that falsely portraying a superior image in order to gain followers is a sign quickly and easily seen through. It will create the opposite effect!
That was an important point – extremely – because many people build a brand based off of a false identity. In time, this just can’t hold up. It’s without substance.
Thank you for the comment and continued support Joe!
Hi JK,
Very good points. I noticed that for myself the process of developing a personal brand was a process of self-discovery. We have to ask ourselves many questions to clarify what the brand is, what we’re all about, and the message we want to portray to others. It has been a wonderful process that is bringing a lot of clarity to my work As I develop my brand personality.
Thanks for your pointers. Loving blessings
Andrea DeBell – britetalk recently posted..Change how you feel- choose happiness
Hi Andrea – you’re so right about it being a discovery process! In fact, it’s a constant evolution…because as we experience more of life, increasing our education and ability to endure (hopefully), our directions of life change.
Thank you for stopping by and adding your jewels to the discussion. Take care!
Hey Jk!
This is a really interesting post. I agree that there everyone should develop a strong awareness of how the desire to be perceived by others. That said I don’t believe that we can completely control how others perceive us.
In fact, I know people who put their best foot forward every day that come across as insincere, self-serving, or egotistical when in fact the seek to do the exact opposite. It’s almost as though their desire to project a particular “personal brand” (as you’ve defined it) causes them to miss the mark.
I’m really tired of the words authenticity and transparency, so I don’t want to use them here, but I think that in order for your personal brand to really be an accurate representation of your “best foot forward” then it must also be uber-closely aligned to who you are at your core.
I say all that to say – when considering how you are to be perceived by others consider who you are at your core first, and follow that direction.
Now that I re-read this, I think this is what John Sherry said. Man I need to stop being late to you kids blogs!
Marlee recently posted..Can You Learn to Love Your Online Business some relationship experts say yes!
Hey Marlee – I think the only thing that we have complete control over is our mind. That being said, I agree: “…I don’t believe that we can completely control how others perceive us.” I don’t think we can control anyone’s perception totally, not even close family. I do, however, believe that we hold an element of control.
Thank you for bringing a new piece to the puzzle.
I understand your position regarding this… “keeping the brand real”… It is a fine line between trying to being something, and being who you are. I attempted to raise this fact in the post…but whether or not it was executed well enough – I think the backbone to a personal brand is about projecting the [real] parts that you want others to display. More than anything it’s a mental thing. Understanding that appropriateness has different truths depending on time and place.
Again, thank you for re-iterating the importance.
PEACE
Hi,
I would first like to say that i went through the same experience myself like Andrea DeBell with self-discovery. After i finish highschool i was looking for a job to pay my college but nobody want to hire me. Why? I haved dyed hair, piercings and my outfit looks awful.
In that moment i realized that i need to make a change so i change my outfit, i took off my piercings and i go to some interviews. I get a job after just two interviews and at that moment i know what i must to do in the future.
Patel Urvisha recently posted..Diet For Diabetic Dogs
Hi Patel – what you described is the essence of what this post is about. It’s about being aware of what you project; your image, the way you communicate….your brand.
Thank you so much for sharing that Patel!
JK, first let me say your site is looking SWEEEEET….Love these images of yourself (the one on your great guest post as well). Talk about branding, this is it brother. You are making it happen in a major way and are walking the walk.
When I look at where my personal brand was 18 months ago, and where it is today, I can only shake my head, partially in disbelief, because like you said here, we do have control. We can shape our branding future. You’re doing it, I’m doing it, and all those persons willing to produce great content and be a part of something ‘bigger’ are doing it in the right way.
Love your direction brother.
Marcus
Marcus Sheridan-The Sales Lion recently posted..How To Use Deadlines To Beat Resistance To Writing
Hey Marcus – I’m glad that you are feeling the new layout. I’ve been tinkering around…and finally created a something that I’m happy with. I killed my site a couple of times messing with the .php – but I figured it out!
You shake your head…imagine the shake that I have…with my initial gravatar, and “Jk Hustle”…I know better than that! But, honestly – I didn’t accurately gauge what would become my audience. And prior to blogging, I had never even followed a blog – so I wasn’t familiar with social construct of the WWW.
Well, keep doing what you’re doing [LEADING THE WAY]…you’re the king of the jungle – I’m just hustler!
PEACE
Personal branding…Hmmm. Might I share a story I wrote about a Common Grackle and an Eagle? The Grackle was perched on a branch with the sun at its back. The position of the sun made the Grackle’s shadow much larger than he actually was. Thinking that the shadow represented his real size (personal branding), the Common Grackle began acting in uncommon ways. Sighting an Eagle flying by, the Common Grackle flew toward the majestic bird, wanting to fly side by side with it. The Eagle, who had observed the Common Grackle with the shadow, allow the common blackbird this privilege. As the eagle parted company, he turned and said, “Take a look at yourself – you are indeed as mighty as your shadow.” Now that is an example of personal branding at its finest! blessing
ROB!!! I don’t even know what to say in response to that story…it brilliantly depicts the power that I’m trying to share in this post. I kinda’ sorta’ got my message across in 800 or so words…you illuminated the entire topic in 50 or so words. Wow!
Thank you for sharing that Rob.
Blessings
Awesome stuff here, Jk! And I like the white car example
Honestly, I’ve never really thought about personal branding in this light before. Stupidly, I’ve only thought about it in a blogging sense, but never in a real world showing-my-best-self-to-those-I-interact-with sense.
Hmmm… You’ve given me a lot to think about here… That’s always the sign of a great blog post
Tristan recently posted..How to Dramatically Increase Your Blog’s Chance of Survival
Hey What’s up Tristian!
I’m glad this post left you thinking… It really falls hand in hand, regarding the branding of your website and your self. I’m glad you stopped by….thanks for the comment!
Jk, I gotta admit, man, I wasn’t sure where you were going at first with the branding talk, but once I read past the first paragraph, I agreed you were right on target (as usual). If there’s one thing I’ve come to understand over the past couple of years alone, it’s that we create our own perceptions of the world. We create our experience in this life. We create what we see. And the way we see it.
I think a lot of people sort of let life happen to them and live their lives with their feelings on display and their emotions on autopilot, but the ones who learn better and that they can CHANGE their feelings at will are the ones who rise to the tops of their games in their careers, relationships, and life.
Thanks for all your great ideas, my friend! You’re truly an inspiration!
Bryan Thompson recently posted..Why a Personal Blog is Your Own Private Psychiatrist
Hey Bryan – I think you stated it well: “we create our own perceptions of the world.” I think it’s important for people to become more empowered, because it’s within them. We hold the key to so much – we just have to be willing to admit to it. It took me sometime, but I eventually came to this (this post’s) realization.
Thanks Bry!
In this day and age, no branding is branding…except you’re just leaving it to the masses to do it based on whatever assumption/stereotypes/background they might have. Much better to take control and do it yourself! Great post, JK!
Hey Stella – Welcome to The Notebook! I like how you positioned that “no branding is branding…except you’re just leaving it to the masses to do it”…
I agree…we can either own it, or allow someone else to own it for us!
I’m so glad that you stopped by. I appreciate your presence here.
Take care Stella!
Thanks for the great post JK,
Personal branding is very essential in our journey towards success whether in business or in life. Like you pointed out, the painful thing about people is that they conclude within seconds of meeting you just before getting to know you deeply and this can be bad.
One thing that I have found helpful, which I also believe is the foundation of effective branding, whether personally or in business is CONSISTENCY. Branding is not a one off habit or activity, it is a deliberate and continuous habit. People always expect you to be your best self, not just a couple of times, but every single time they come in contact with you or your business. Meaning, you have got to set up strategies on how you are going to keep portraying that positive image you want to plant in the minds of others about you or your business. And this is where the bulk of the work lies, many people simply haven’t weaved out that strategy that can make their actions, behaviours and attitudes consistent with the perception they are trying to create in other people’s mind.
Tito Philips, Jnr. recently posted..The 4 Elements Of Effective BRANDING
Tito – you nailed it! You nailed it perfectly in the center! Consistency is paramount. Without, you don’t establish a brand – you establish confusion. I think it’s good to change things up, but the backbone should be consistent.
Awesome comment man! You added a bucket full of value that others will surely learn from. I appreciate that Tito! PEACE
Hi Allen,
There are certainly some things we have no control over: racism, sexism, ageism and many other. But also, as you said ‘How we dress, How we communicate, has a massive impact on the way people perceive us.’ and that’s true, it does matter a lot. It’s also a lot
depending on the self-esteem, the more you respect yourself – the more will everybody respect you as well. Thanks for sharing!
Best regards,
Maria
Maria Pavel recently posted..Certified Nursing Assistant Practice Test
Hi Miss Pavel – You mentioned respect, and that’s something that I mean to add to this post. If you don’t display respect for yourself…you can’t expect anyone else to respect you.
Thank you for adding that. That’s a perfect mention for this topic.
> I had to take some ownership
Magic always happens when we take the bull by the horns. Either we rise to the challenge, grow in the process, or learn another way how not to do something.
Owning it goes so much further than wishing or hoping. It’s all too easy to fall into the trap of how the world should be or wanting it to be another way. Our power comes when we see things the way they are, but also see how things could be, then make it happen, and lead by example.
J.D. Meier recently posted..Conflict Management Styles at a Glance
Thank you for the great comment J.D. Please excuse my tardy’ness in replying. I find that it’s super important to take the bull by the horns. Owning it produces better results. But first, before ownership can be taken…there has to be a realization factor that we are more empowered than we give ourselves credit for.
Negative perception of people or of any other thing can prove to be a graet havoc. It depresses oneself and make him lose many opportunities. One can control it by self introspection and lokking into one’s self.
Ranjith recently posted..The rise and fall of hopes
Hi Ranjith – Thank you so much for stopping by and commenting! To a degree, we can take some ownership to combat the negative perceptions that initiate purely out of presentation. It’s sad that it happens, but fortunately there is somewhat of a antidote, if we’re willing to use it. And that’s what I shared here, as you know.
Thank you for stopping by. Your insight is are valuable, welcomed and wanted!
Hi JK -
I must say another great article you’ve written. You are blessed with great insights about normal ordinary actions and the powerful impact it has on people around us.
For years, I had a monster inside me called “anger” that would erupt at the slightest perceived injustice. I remember one time getting mad at my sister on a decision I MADE. I promised my sister that I would spend time with her and then changed my mind and spend time with my friends instead. We didn’t talk for months; my anger or pride didn’t allow me to speak to her. Until one day I let go of the pain and called her to see how she was doing one day. Today we are closer than we have ever been.
I liked how you wrote: Your personal brand isn’t meant to deceive, it’s meant to accurately portray.
The truth is that during that time I held my anger… I didn’t speak to my sister, but I still loved her. But my actions at the time would say – Hi my name is Elmer…and I hate my sister. This personal branding would create an inaccurate portrayal of what I was feeling at the time.
I know that inside I’m a sincere, loving, easy-going person, but I wanted to change the way I portrayed myself to the world, especially to my family. It was funny because how I was inside did not match the outside. So I got the counseling I needed to help recognize my irrational thought patterns and behavior and respond appropriately. I learned that anger is simply a secondary response – I needed to recognized that at first before I can change. People are often confused, hurt, or shocked before they get angry.
Anyway, now I’m doing everything I can to portray myself the best way I can to the world. I read books about marriages and leadership to be a better husband and wife. I volunteer at work, church, and non-profit organizations. I’m hosting classes that teaches fiscal responsibility to help show the world that I consider myself a leader. I also am taking a stand-up comedy class to help portray a funnier side of myself.
In a way personal branding is how you represent yourself to everyone including the perceptions of people closest to you . Imagine if I kept my anger problem? I’d have a marriage in shambles, organization that won’t allow me to volunteer organization, people won’t listen to my financial advice, and as a comedian – well maybe I’d be a funnier comedian- but you get my point.
Would you take advice the from that angry comedian? I wouldn’t because taking advice from him is like selling your soul to the devil – sounds like a good deal at first, but in the end your always damned.
Elmer
First impressions are everything in business Jk. From the person who happily answers your business phones and provides the first experience of your company to potential new customers to the sales, and customer service departments who win and keep them happy, its the perception of your company that makes the whole thing go around.
The same applies to an individual. You must put your best foot forward to present the fullness and richness of the package. Especially when you’re young with little experience or background. A fresh suit, excited attitude and confident disposition and take you places you’ve only dreamed of.
Everybody had to start somewhere and the self-made success stories we’ve read and heard about got where they are by putting their best foot forward meeting all of the challenges along the way.
Well done once again Jk, loved it : )
Mark Harai recently posted..5 Tips on How to Become an A-List Blogger
Hi JK, I have two stories which I’ll try and keep brief.
When I was 16, I made the decision to shave my hair off. Now for a 16yr old black girl growing up in the neighbourhood I came from, this just wasn’t done. It was all about hair and image. No-one cared whose head that hair came from, as long as it ended up on theirs. I can’t even say my thoughts where that involved at the time. I just wanted to look in the mirror and finally see me, after years of working hard to keep my glamour up and look like everyone else.
I received a few reactions, girls started treating me different, if I was tactile with them when I spoke, they got jumpy, as if I was trying to hit on them, and then it hit me. They thought me shaving off my hair was me coming out, lol.
Guys who has previously tried to hit on me, gave me a wide berth, told me I looked ugly like that, and should never have cut off my hair. That hurt, but the big chop was done, so I learnt to live with it.
The most surprising thing where the men, who I’d never even notice who came out of the woodwork, older men, men from different backgrounds, men of different ethnicities. It sounds strange to say, but in some circles I began to be treated like a women, a queen. I started to have new experiences based on the way I looked, some negative some positive. I began to realise that my short hair” weeded out the wankers”, if I’m allowed to say that here. All those who were immediately offended by naturality, swiftly moved on to the next chic with the big weave, and all those intrigued by me, and the brass balls it took to do such a thing, stuck around. I’ve since done that big chop on a few occasions, usually when I loose my sense of self and need to be humbled and aligned.
I then worked for a big fashion publication, and with my indie chic way of dressing, I kind of stood out, but not in a good way. It was made clear to me, that I wasn’t slick or polished enough and that’s what was required to get ahead in the fashion game. Despite being intensely good at my job, and having the 2.1 degree in my subject. To prove I was part of the team, it would seam they required me to be this stick thin fashion plate, who brown nosed all day everyday, in order to get ahead. I swiftly left, despite my passion for it. I was more passionate about being me, than trying to fit in with the crowd and the fakers.
I totally hear what your saying about image perception and brand management, I see it with my own brothers, the way they are treated and overlooked for things based on the way they speak, dress, and the overtone of street in their behaviour. It saddens me, when old ladies hold there bags tighter as they walk past, but I do understand where that negative stereotype come from. To conclude I would say, modify yourself as far as your authenticity allows. Don’t become someone else just to fit in, or be treated like an equal. Shine as you are, do great things, make sure your name rings out positively until all those who matter, have no choice but to speak of you positively. And if they can’t or don’t, well that’s one less “wanker” you have to worry about. I tried to keep it brief, but failed. I apologise : )
Stacey Herbert recently posted..Can A Hustler Become An Entrepreneur
What’s a wanker?
It is tough being an individualist; more times than not you will meet resistance. Unfortunately some of your extremes made people uncomfortable around you as you were no longer ‘cool’ to be around in most of the mainstream world.
I applaud you for having the fortitude to march to your own drummer, but just be prepared to meet resistance as you have already seen.
You know I love ya baby, hair or no hair………….:). I’m proud to tell people you are my friend.
Bill Dorman recently posted..Well- that was awkward…
Yes, it does matter; you can want to be a non-conformist and act like looks and perception don’t matter, but we all know they do.
You are pre-judged by the color of your skin, the company you keep, the way you talk, the way you dress, how you interact w/ others, on and on and on. It’s reality.
I might have mentioned this to you, but I am a volunteer Guardian ad Litem. I am the voice for abused and neglected kids who have been placed in care of the state. It’s a whole different world for them; one you can’t even imagine. What it has helped me with is not pre-judging regardless of what I read on paper or people are telling me. I try to carry this over to my ‘normal’ life as well.
Good post JK, and good to see you; is that your grill up there? Smooth………:)
Bill Dorman recently posted..Well- that was awkward…
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